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Relationship expert Audrey Hope told me, "Not only have you grown in time, but you have also grown in your self-worth and experience, and can therefore magnetize a better love match through the law of attraction.You lived through and survived the bad boys (or bad girls), the ones who broke your heart, and so now after 40, you are ready for mature and lasting love." She continued, "You have probably deepened from experiences and are now looking more at the soul, the heart, and the inside of the person, rather than their hair and pant size. If you were dating actively 20 years ago, you likely had to rely on actually going out and meeting potential mates in public places, like bars and clubs.

"Dating is going to have a different landscape after 40 because people are more likely to have been through a divorce or have kids," relationships expert Jennifer Seiter told me.

— As a dating coach for single women over 40, one of the first questions I ask a client is, “What’s your biggest problem in dating? I recently asked a group of about 300 single, divorced, and widowed women over 40 what their biggest problems were in dating. They want to be appreciated for more than their bodies.

” I want to know what they’ve tried and what their struggles are. I wanted to see how many struggled with the same issues. So guys, please pay attention to more than the boobs and the butt. Those things are far more important than a Harvard or Yale degree, or whether or not he speaks Mandarin.

That's not to suggest that you are all business, all of the time.

But you likely have moved past the messy, surface stuff that defines dating in your youth.

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