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She has already purchased her wedding gown and booked a reception hall. “I never thought I would actually meet someone I’d want to marry from one of these sites.” Twenty-two-year-old Rebecca (not her real name) meets me at Cosmos Coffee Café in La Mesa on a Wednesday night. In eight months, Bekah and Christian are getting married. She decided to Skype with him to avoid the possibility of a wasted Friday evening. What a cheapskate.” When she denied the photographer a second date, he sent a scathing email telling Bekah that she wasn’t “hot enough to be so picky.” “I am 32 years old! “I should be married by now.” Then came Mike, the Johnny Depp look-alike. She signed up with the site Christian Mingle, hoping to find like-minded, faith-based men. I was a young, Southern, Alabama girl looking for a relationship.
Being a physician, you wouldn’t believe the things I have seen! Fifteen minutes into their Skype date, the guy held up a framed picture of his ex-girlfriend and asked, “Do you think she’s hot? She exchanged countless emails with a photographer before meeting him. But it turned out that the photographer looked nothing like his pictures. Bekah gave up hope of meeting a normal guy through a dating site. One night, out of boredom, she typed the physical characteristics of her ideal man into Match.com’s search engine. I learned quickly that maybe one out of 50 guys on there really wanted to get to know me.
I called my parents on the way to the airport and said, ‘I’m moving to California.
If you want, you can meet me for lunch before I leave.’ My dad was so upset, he had a breakdown. They thought it was insane.” Rebecca’s parents had a hard time grasping that their 19-year-old daughter had dropped out of school and was moving across the country to live with a guy after spending only five days together. By July 4, she realized that Chris had portrayed himself one way over the internet when, in reality, he was a completely different person.
He almost cried when I said no.” Rebecca shows me her phone. “It takes me maybe 30 minutes on any given night to find a guy to go out with. Someone always gets back to me.” Rebecca has never gone out with anyone outside of internet dating. My 40-year-old coworker says she wishes she did what I am doing now when she was my age.” “The problem with online dating in this town is that we live in Man Diego.
There are dozens of text messages from different men. She has no idea what it’s like to meet someone randomly without checking out stats beforehand: height, weight, smoker, likes or dislikes dogs, does or does not want kids. There are not enough women to go around,” Carlos (not his real name) says.